from 心如加油站
2002/10/3-21:24:13

HELLO:
大家好,好久好久不見了!想想我也有很常時間沒有上網跟大家聊聊天,忙完半生緣後真的休息了一小段時間,但其實也還好耶!因為中間我也陸陸續續有一些小工作拍廣告ㄚ錄音ㄚ....不過都還算輕鬆就是了!

說到這次的原聲帶我個人還蠻滿意的,可能裡頭的歌真的都很貼近半生緣的故事我唱起來特別有感覺,我覺得......嗯還不錯吧!會不會噁心了點自己這樣說!可我真的蠻喜歡的!演完半生緣真的有種意尤未盡的感覺,真的讓我深陷"半生緣"當中,我已經很久沒有過這樣的感覺了,是那種讓我一想到戲裡的片段心裡就會有一陣莫名的悸動!這是我自拍完還珠之後就沒有過的感覺,真的一部好戲是值得讓人回味許久的,所以我也很期待''還三''又會帶給我們大家什麼樣的震撼和感動!我也希望我在半生緣中的表現會給大家看到新的感覺最起碼是一種成長,也讓我自己踏出新的一步!可是我也擔心大家真的能夠''看的到''嗎?因為一些問題所以它什麼時間能播出誰也不知道......唉想到都很洩氣呢!不能說太多以免......我不想再引發什麼事端了!演藝圈真麻煩!

最近真的是一個過渡期吧我覺得自己的情緒也挺不穩定的!ㄟ別八卦ㄚ可不是你們想的感情問題,這些''娛樂新聞''我從不放在心上,反正天天都有新戲上畫,無所謂的做這一行就是這樣我們是''食得鹹魚抵的渴''(廣東話來的)所以囉!別為我擔心!我讓我覺得煩心的其實還是都是工作上的問題,其實我也檢討了自己很多為什麼老是會有人說林心如耍大排.林心如恃寵而驕....我真的聽的很煩很厭了這比傳緋聞還要讓人氣餒你知道嗎,因我真的沒有ㄚ,卻要一再的被這些新聞給傷害我真的會很難過,憑良心講從我開始有一點''自主權''後我接戲只有兩個原則其實很簡單的我認為每一個演員都差不多就是劇本和工作TEAM,如果我本身都對這個故事及人物沒感覺的話我怎麼可能去說服我自己投入到角色當中呢!當然這中間不乏很多好劇本但是我真的只有一個人我無法分身去接演很多部戲,當然會有一些取捨,真的無法面面俱到誰都不得罪!結果就只有三個字''耍大排''!做人真難,做藝人更難!你說容易嘛!

向你們吐這些苦水其實我認為也不是那麼恰當,只是我真的不想你們誤會了或是你們的朋友覺得你們怎麼喜歡這樣的藝人,我不想我的FANS覺得很丟臉好像他們的老大怎麼一天到晚都是一些負面的新聞讓別人質疑你們的眼光,因為我也是愛面子的人,我知道讓別人說你喜歡的人不好是一種很差的感覺!所以囉!就是這樣我才會說最近一陣子的情緒波動是蠻大的,其實也影響了我身邊的人,家人朋友,在這我也要對他們說聲抱歉!還有也在思考自己的未來,我真的覺得自己已經原地踏步了好久了,你們都知道除了拍電視劇我還想嘗試很多不一樣的譬如電影,唱片甚至是舞台劇讓自己的演藝生命更豐富更多原化一點!沒錯我做了,但是很令人失望,去年拍了兩部所謂的''電影''........出了唱片.....算了有太多事是不能說的內幕,你們是不會懂的,我只能說我會繼續努力!或許我是該換個環境吧!可能會有一些新的刺激,一些新的表現,''人是不應該原地不動的''!

你們的支持是我前進的動力!

謝謝
這世界因為有你們而變的美好!
RUBY
 

ENGLISH TRANSLATION
by Jackie

HELLO:
How is everyboy, long time no see! Come to think of it, it has been a very long time since I came online to chat w/ everyone. After finishing BSY(18 Springs), I had a little rest. This is actually not that bad! During that time, I did some advertisements & recording...but they are quite easy-going!

On mentioning the soundtrack, I'm quite satisfied w/ it. Maybe b/c the songs really came close to BSY's story. When I sang them, I really can feel them. I think...um not bad! Is it too shameless to say that?!! After finishing BSY, there's an endless feeling, it really allowed me to dive into the depth of BSY's story. I haven't had this sort of feeling for quite a while, it's the type of feeling u get when thinking of certain scenes in a drama, that unexplanable palpitating feeling. This is the very feeling that I have not had since Huan Zhu. A great drama series will have people reminiscing for a long time. That's why I'm also looking forward to HZGG3 to bring us that sort of shocking excitment. I also hope that my performance in BSY will bring to everybody a new sense of feeling. At the very least, it's a sense of growth and also a new step forward for me! But I'm also worried "will everyone be able to see it?" B/C of certain problems, I don't know when it'll be broadcast...sigh..thinking about this matter really annoys me! Can't say too much of this or else....I don't want to start any troubles! This entertainment business is really troublesome!

I have been going through a phase lately. I'm going through some mood swings. Oh, don't be so nosy, it's not the thing that u guys are thinking about, it's not about my love life. These "entertainment news", I don't put them to heart. There are new "movies" coming out everyday, I don't care. In this business, "when one eats salty-preserved fish, one must endure thirst(Cantonese saying)." And so, don't worry about me! What really bothers me now is really having to do w/ my work. Frankly, I'm really quite annoyed & don't understand why people are always saying Lin Xinru is "playing the big card"(<--act like a bigshot), "special treatments has gotten to Lin Xinru's head." I'm very angry & annoyed everytime I hear these rumors. Do u guys know that these rumors hurt me more than the rumors about my personal life? I have never acted like that(like a bigshot), and yet these rumors are constantly hurting me. I feel really sad. From my heart, ever since I had a little "saying power", I only ask for 2 simple things. Basically, all actors want is a script & work team(cast member/staff). How can I act or immerse myself into the character if I have no particular feelings towards the story & it's characters. Of course during this time there were lot of scripts, but I'm only 1 person. I cannot accept all of them. There's bound to be some being left out. It's impossible for me to not "irk/slight" some people off(by my refusals). THE RESULT, just 3 words "play big card." It's hard enough being human, but it's harder to be an actor! Who says it's easy huh?

I feel it's rather inappropriate for me to spill my sorrows to all of u. It's that I don't want u guys to misunderstand me or for your friends to say why do u like an actress like that. I don't want my fans to feel ashamed, it's like why is your "lao da"(leader) always having these type of news to question your taste. I also like to save face. I know when people say that the person u guys like is not a good person, is not a good feeling. That's why I said that I not in a good mood lately. My mood swings also had affected my family & friends. I want to take this opportunity to apologize to them! I'm also thinking about my future, I feel that I have been in this same situation for quite a long time now. All of u know that beside filming TV drama series, I also want to try many different things like filming movies, recording, as well as stage acting, in order to span my horizons. Yes, I was able to do them. But they have been disappointing. Last year, I made 2 so-called movies.....released a CD...forget it, there are too many behind-the-scene situations that I cannot mention. U guys will not understand. All I can say is I will continue to work hard! Perhaps I should have a change of scenery! It might bring some new excitement/rush, some new performance. One cannot be still for too long!

Your support is my reason for moving forward!

Thank you
The world is a better place b/c of u guys!
RUBY